thoughts

la vie en rose

from the archive— December 15, 2020

i hope that you will fall in love with yourself again

like you did when you saw the world

through rose colored glasses.

bask in the pink of your hands

and rejoice in the love surrounding you.

you are powerful.

you are love.

space

from the archive— December 20, 2020

one day

the planets will align

and everything will be right.

you’ll come back to earth.

you’ll hold me in your arms and finally kiss me

like you do in the dreams that have haunted.

you’ll tell me everything i wanted to hear.

you’ll say that the moon was boring—

that the space you explored cannot compare

to sound of my voice and the words on my lips.

but right now,

mercury is in retrograde

venus, the planet of love,

is at aphelion,

and you are still lost to the endless vastness

of the stars.

why did i start a blog?

July 5, 2022

hi friends!

i feel like the choice to start a blog was one completely inspired by a little bit of delusion, mania, and impulsiveness. i've always wanted to have some form of creative outlet. there's always been a part of me that wishes to have the ability of expression. growing up, i've longed to be able to express myself through dance, instruments, art, etc— as i've never had the "traditional" childhood hobby that's allowed for such expression. so this blog is the result of overwhelming pressure built from within.

i've always considered myself a writer. in secret, mainly. thanks to the formative experiences of the pandemic and quarantine— mostly the endless amount of time to sit with my thoughts— i started a journal. it became a space of growth and development, emotional maturity becoming evident through the evolution of the pages. it grounded me in the craziness of my life, becoming a constant reminder of the passing of time and lesson that life goes on. it is in these pages that i grew to become comfortable with myself.

i always liked to say that i wrote with the purpose of documentation— to record events and experiences. one of my favorite hobbies is pen-palling. i have had over a dozen penpals, probably wrote over 100+ letters, i even wrote my college essays on it! i fully enjoyed the aspect of immersing myself into other people's life, and vice versa. i never in a million years would have considered creative writing.

anyway— here i am. i'm here to say that by no means am i a professional writer— most things that i'll probably put on here are half-assed and straight from the notes app and my journals. and sure it may be cringy and somewhat pretentious and milk-and-honey-esque, but it's something i'd like to share with the world. i've heard somewhere that the mark of a true artist is vulnerability, and it's been the tenet that has inspired and motivated me to go forward with creating this blog. so i, from the bottom of my heart, am beyond grateful for the first audience i have ever written to.

with love,

christian